Words Are My Weapon: Half Daze

There is a mental check-list in my head- a list of tasks that collectively provide an admonishing message. But that message is not something tangible, it is an idea..something illusory. It seems as if the days are getting shorter, the tasks, closer to becoming part of my past, rather than the future. But when half days put me in a half daze, when reading and writing and memorizing and regurgitating information all mix into a soup of pageantry and desperate (yet oft’ too little an) effort, what does that mean? Where does that leave us?

Does it make me a bad person to crave something beyond that plastic existence? Does it make me shallow or fickle to enjoy my hobbies as much during a school semester as I do when I’m free? Will it make me a bad worker? A destructive member of a utilitarian society? Or will it set me free- allow me to see that there are not chains that bind me to my path- that I can get up and off of this track of existence and choose something different? Maybe, if I open my eyes, I’ll discover that there is more, and my half daze was never noticing (or embracing) that before.